October: Domestic Violence Awareness Month — What It Means to Me and My Family

Every October, the world turns a little more purple. Awareness campaigns roll out, ribbons are tied, and survivors and advocates raise their voices a little louder. But for me and my family, October is not just a month of awareness—it is a deeply personal reminder of the realities we’ve lived through and the people we’ve lost.

Domestic violence is not an abstract issue in our lives. It has shaped us, scarred us, and ultimately pushed us into a place of advocacy and survival. My children and I know what it means to live in the shadow of abuse, to walk on eggshells, to wonder if safety and peace will ever be more than fleeting moments. Escaping that darkness was not easy, but it was necessary. It was a fight for our lives and for the chance to heal. That is why Domestic Violence Awareness Month matters to us—it represents not only our story, but the stories of so many who are still trapped in silence.

And yet, our connection to this issue goes beyond our own survival. In 2013, our family lost someone we loved to femicide. She was taken from us most brutally—her life cut short by the very person who was supposed to love and protect her. Her death shattered us, and it was a painful reminder that not every story of abuse ends in survival. Behind every statistic is a face, a name, and a family left with a void that can never be filled. October is a time when her memory weighs heavily on our hearts, when we honour her life and grieve the future she never got to live.

When I see purple ribbons, I see more than symbols. I see my children’s resilience, their laughter slowly returning after years of fear. I see my journey of learning to stand again, trust again, and find my voice after it had been silenced for so long. I see the faces of those who didn’t make it out—those whose stories ended far too soon, like Rebecca in 2013. Domestic Violence Awareness Month is not about statistics for us; it is about people we loved, the pain we endured, and the hope that others will never have to walk the same road.

This month is also a call to action. Awareness means nothing if it does not move us to stand with victims and survivors. Abuse thrives in silence, and when people remain neutral or look the other way, the cycle of violence continues. Too often, communities, churches, and even families choose silence because it feels easier than confronting the uncomfortable truth. But silence protects abusers, not victims. If October teaches us anything, our voices matter—and when we choose to speak, we become part of the solution.

For me and my family, October is not about staying stuck in what happened to us. It’s about transforming pain into purpose. It’s about raising our voices for those who still can’t. It’s about remembering Rebecca whose life was stolen, and honouring her by making sure her story—and the countless others like hers—are not forgotten. It’s about showing my children that while evil exists, so does resilience, healing, and hope.

So when the month of October comes and the purple ribbons appear, I see resilience, not just awareness. I see grief and remembrance. I see my children’s courage and my cousin’s memory. And I know a promise: that we will keep speaking, keep fighting, and keep standing with survivors until silence no longer has the power to protect abusers, and every victim knows they are not alone.